What happens if you are finally lucky enough to find your Prince, and he makes you feel so happy and settled in yourself that you no longer want to be a princess in flight? Usually, couples refer to this moment as: “the decision to cohabit.” Some say that living together before marriage leads to no marriage at all. But then, wouldn’t it just be a rational step towards avoiding divorce?

A girl I know has been living happily in an apartment with her boyfriend of five years. The realities of her domestic communal existence mystified me, since I have never met my own Prince and I could never imagine folding a Wanker’s underwear with any feelings but spite. But just as this laundress-slash-girlfriend was daydreaming about her upcoming anniversary plans, her boyfriend reported that he was no longer in love with her. All it took was a “boys’ weekend” away playing field games with balls and mallets for her Prince to devolve into a class A Wanker of the Week. He told her that the only thing that kept him from cheating on her was the fact that there were no available women on the playing field. I guess there were only balls and mallets.

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