One of the most endearing ways to pass a Sunday afternoon is at the guignol theatre in the Luxembourg Gardens, where Parisian children become entranced by tranny-looking marionettes beating each other on the heads with sticks, brooms, feather dusters, and other phallic objects.
On this particular Sunday there was a brawl between a woman and the [...]

Today a semi-sinister man dropped a bundle of business cards on the street in front of me. I picked them up and tried to give them back to him, but he was walking too quickly. And then he dropped an orange Louis Vuitton card case. I picked that up too. And then I realized that [...]

There is just something about young boys; I met a pure and beautiful one on a random Parisian street corner. At first I took him for a creeper and didn’t want to remove my sunglasses to look him in the eyes. But then I realized he had a genuine interest in cinema, a flair for [...]

Salum has managed a local gourmet ice cream shop ever since he moved to America from Mozambique nine years ago. He lives above the ice cream store and has worked nonstop 365 days a year for the past 9 years. At 7am he reports to duty making the ice cream from scratch, at 4:30 in [...]

Let’s just say for the sake of argument that my friend was dating a boy named Dick Inwood. He was a prince with a roving eye and without vertebrae. He was fond of nights out in Shanghai, girls who wear Uggs, SKEX (Sex via Skype), and the law—not necessarily in that order. Dick Inwood makes [...]

A thunderstorm and a marathon of David Lynch’s surreal-sinister TV series, Twin Peaks, devolved into an afternoon receiving wisdom from a psychic named Stacey in the Leather District. When a Parisian pop start receives a tarot card reading at the start of Agnès Varda’s Cléo de 5 à 7, she learns that she is going [...]

What happens if you are finally lucky enough to find your Prince, and he makes you feel so happy and settled in yourself that you no longer want to be a princess in flight? Usually, couples refer to this moment as: “the decision to cohabit.” Some say that living together before marriage leads to no [...]

On a rainy day in Manhattan there’s no better thing to do than to watch an Andy Warhol film. Luckily, the MoMA was showing Harlot, which consists of one very long (67-minute) shot of a transvestite in a white ballgown, ratty blonde wig, and diamond jewels. ‘She’ reclines on a couch, nestled in with a [...]

I want to believe that prince-like things still exist in this age of doomed chivalry and philandering father figures—that terrifying Austrian man who kept his daughter locked in a cellar for 24 years being an extreme example.
It is hard to find the right type of romance, that makes your heart beat faster—but not so fast [...]

“Spring Fling.” Such telling words? During the sultry early-summer day I contemplated the issue of virginity. If you are a girl about to graduate from university, and you have not had that first ’struggle between the sheets’ with a mimbo, wanker, pimp, or ever-elusive prince, then should you keep waiting? Should you hold out for [...]